What Is Scrotox?
What Is Scrotox? We Asked The Experts About Getting Botox Down There
Do your balls hang low? Could ya tie ‘em in a bow? Well, mine do and I’m sick and tired of it. Jokes aside, you can really get a sense of a guy by the way he thinks about his testicles. Think of your balls the way women think of their breasts: they come in different shapes and sizes, and don’t all hang equally. For those of us out there (like me) who can’t accept the way our bodies were made, there’s a solution: Scrotox.
Yep, Botox for your balls. When I was approached by the editors of AskMen and asked whether or not I was interested in pursuing a story about this weird fashion trend, I instantly said yes. See, I’m a perfectionist — I have very specific standards about how my stuff should look and I’ve been dissatisfied with the state of my scrotum for years. It makes me look old, like a retired banker who’s contemplating buying a boat. Plus — with the oodles of porn I’ve watched — I know how some scrotums could look.
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Thus began my deep dive into the world of Scrotox. It’s a journey that took me into the offices of doctors and made my hands sweaty beyond belief. While I (spoiler alert) didn’t end up getting the procedure, I learned enough about it to wrap my head around why so many guys want their wrinkliest bits ironed out.
Not All Doctors Are Into It
I honestly thought it would be a huge pain to find a doctor to talk to me about Scrotox, but I was pleasantly surprised to see that even the most preliminary Google search produced scores of results leading to plastic surgeons either performing this procedure or at least willing to chat about it.
The immature side of me couldn’t help but laugh seeing the subject “re: Scrotox” in my inbox, but with many to choose from, I found my first contact: world famous Beverly Hills plastic surgeon Dr. Leslie Stevens. Of course he’s located in Beverly Hills. With over 25 years of experience in plastic surgery, Dr. Stevens’ approach to Scrotox was one of skepticism.
“It was just a matter of time that someone would dream up using Botox on the scrotum,” said Dr. Stevens in an interview. “The purpose of which conceivably is to smooth out the wrinkles and folds in the scrotal sack and make one’s testicles hang lower.”
Looking down at my own ugly balls, I asked myself if I wanted this little bag of sperm to get even lower than it already was.
Who Is Doing It?
“Why do people do this?” I asked. “Don’t guys know that scrotums change? Who’s doing this?”
“Anyone who wants a smooth scrotum and lower hanging testicles, I suppose,” responded Stevens. The good doctor then reassured me that it’s not as extreme as a procedure as one would think.
“It does not hurt that much,” continued Stevens, “especially if numbing cream is used first.” For what it’s worth, you absolutely should use numbing cream… because it’s your testicles.
“It actually takes just minutes to inject the Botox, but about 5 to 7 days to see the effects.” The effects Stevens speak of are pretty straightforward when dealing with a neurotoxic protein like Botox: It’s injected into the muscle underneath the skin, which prevents the release of neurotransmitter acetylcholine and essentially causes temporary paralysis. That’s why, when you see someone smile who’s had too much Botox, it looks like their face is frozen.
When it comes to your actual testicles, you’re given a makeover that gives whoever’s seeing them the impression that they’re beholding the golden balls of Robert Redford circa 1970. This could be the future of skincare.
Is It Worth It For You?
Botox usually lasts between three and six months, depending on how many units of the neurotoxic protein you inject, and — surprisingly — it’s kind of cheap. “Depending on where one lives, Botox runs about $ 15 per unit,” said Dr. Stevens. “Injecting the scrotum would take at least 30 to 50 units, depending on its size of course.” When I finally asked the question of whether it would be worth it for me, Dr. S gave me some helpful advice:
“The function of the scrotum is to contain the testicles outside of the body core, as sperm do better and survive longer at a lower temperature than inside one’s body. The dartos muscles of the scrotum function to regulate temperature. When it is cold, the scrotum contracts, keeping the testicles closer to the body and keeping the sperm cells warmer. When it is warm, the muscles relax so the sperm can stay cooler. If one uses Botox in the scrotum, your body loses some of this temperature regulation.”
“But is it worth it?” I asked.
“If ones expectations are met, then it is worth it.” This final statement inspired me to revisit the ongoing conversation between my head and my crotch and get naked in front of a mirror. What I found was a fine body with a fine — albeit imperfect — scrotum. It was Dr. Stevens’ last statement that really put things into perspective. Sure, my balls could end up looking better, but what if it affected the way my body regulated temperature?
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While no doctor mentioned any cases in which patients’ sperm died, the threat of losing my little guys stayed at the forefront of my mind. Scrotums, like breasts, aren’t meant to look the way they appear in porn. They hang, they wrinkle, and they sway — just the way nature intended. And who am I to mess with nature? In the end, I decided that I don’t have to love my body — just like it. With that, I forewent any further digging into the Scrotox wormhole and decided to let hanging balls lie. AskMen